Live Like You Were Dying
by Sango0808
Summary: The doctors say I'm dying, but I think only now have I truly began to live. Miroku's P.O.V AU R


Today I'm only thinking one thing. Why? I want to know why. Why people are jealous, why do we hate, why do we limit ourselves by being selfish and cruel. Why does it seem that for every good, pure person there are ten more evil ones to knock him down. Why do we hold grudges. Why do we need a hard smack upside the head, or cruel twist of fate to realize that we should always be good and kind to others. It's not what they do in return, its the feeling you get by helping, and knowing that you have made a change in a world slowly spiraling downward. It's once we reach the end of our ropes that we finally stop looking ahead and look back on our lives. Only then can we truly see the mistakes we've made and how we could have changed. And if that means we can not change our own lives, why don't we pass the lesson on to future generations, knowing they can enter the world with the wisdom you could only gain leaving it.

Maybe it took me a cruel twist of fate to realize this, but at least I haven't reached the end of my rope. I'm not willing to leave this world with out making a difference. The doctors say I'm dying, but I think only now have I truly began to live.

It was a long time ago when fate decided to play games with me. I was four when my father died. It took him a lot quicker than it will take me. It's cancer. In the time of my father, cancer was known and feared. There was little anyone could do about it. Now, although it is still going to get me someday, I have it a lot better than my dad. Before he left this world, he wrote me a letter, and gave it to my god father. I wanted to open it, but my god father said it wasn't to be opened until my Twentieth birthday. I never understood why, not until now. It's two weeks after my twentieth birthday, and I received a letter in the mail today. Now it all makes sense.

_He said I was in my early 40's,  
With a lot of life before me,  
And a moment came that stopped me on a dime.  
I spent most of the next days, lookin' at the x-rays,  
Talkin' 'bout the options and talkin' 'bout sweet time.  
Asked him when it sank in, that this might really be the real end.  
How's it hit ya, when you get that kind of news.  
Man what ya do.  
And he says,_

_Dear Miroku. You may have long forgotten about this letter, and maybe even me. I wish I had a chance to get to know you better. I pray that you don't get this sickness from me. I hope your life ends blissfully in your sleep when your 99. Either way, I think this is something you should do before your dying._

_Chorus_

_I went sky divin',  
I went rocky mountain climbin',  
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull name Fu Manchu.  
And I loved deeper,  
And I spoke sweeter,  
And I gave forgiveness I've been denying,  
And he said someday I hope you get the chance,  
To live like you were dyin'._

A tear slid down my cheek as I remembered my dad, and all the good times I had with him while he was alive. He was always so wise, caring and concerned. He did everything and anything he could for everone around him. My mom always said he was an angel who had lost his wings. I wish he hadn't had to get them back so soon. I looked back to the letter, smiling a bitter sweet smile.

_He said I was finally the husband,  
That most the time I wasn't.  
And I became a friend a friend would like to have.  
And all the sudden goin' fishing,  
Wasn't such an imposition.  
And I went three times that year I lost my dad.  
Well I finally read the good book,  
And I took a good long hard look at what I'd do  
If I could do it all again.  
And then._

_I went sky divin',  
I went rocky mountain climbin',  
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull name Fu Manchu.  
And I loved deeper,  
And I spoke sweeter,  
And I gave forgiveness I've been denying,  
And he said someday I hope you get the chance,  
To live like you were dyin'._

My father was always the kind to give advice. Or be the shoulder to cry on. He always seemed so wise to me, and so strong. Those who knew my father best say I am a lot like him. In too many ways, I feel some days. I don't hate my dad for giving me his genes. I love my violet eyes, and I get my good looks from him. If only I hadn't gotten the same death sentence. I always said to myself I would make the most out of life... starting tomorrow. Of course I never did. Maybe right now was the time to start...

_I just thought you should have your whole life before you and still realize how precious it is. _

_I miss you son, and I wish you the happiest and fullest of lives. _

_Love: Your father_

I put down the note, and I began to sob. I wasn't crying out of sadness so much as I was happiness. I had never felt closure with my father's death. Now, however, I finally felt like I could completely move on. He always had been wise, but this was the best lesson he could have ever taught me. Finally my tears subsided. I decided that it was time I go and do something with my life.

I called someone, finding the courage I never could before. And did something I had always been putting off.

"Hello?" came her sweet, melodic voice.

"Hey Sango. You know, I was wondering... I hear that there's some pretty good movies out in theatres lately. Maybe we should go check one out, and maybe go out to dinner, my treat?" My heart was pounding feircly in my chest, I could barely hear her reply over my own pulse. I health my breath as she paused to think about it.

"I'd love to Miroku. What time?"

"Sixish? I'll come pick you up then if thats good" I said, trying not to sound as excited as I was.

"Sounds perfect. See you then"

"Bye"

"Goodbye Miroku"

I checked my watch, it was already 4 o'clock. That gave me some time to get ready, and some time to do something else I needed to do.

Before I went to get ready, I made one more call.

"Hello, Dr. Osaki's office, how may I help you?"

"Hello. This is Miroku. I was hoping to make an appointment with Dr. Osaki as soon as possible"

"Of course, Miroku. May I ask what about?"

"I just wondered if we could do a couple tests. I want to see just how well I'm doing. I think this time it will be a clean bill of health" I heard the secratary chuckle on the other end.

"Okay Miroku. You know, there was just a cancellation. Is tomorrow at 3 o'clock okay for you? Or is that too soon?" she asked

"That's perfect my dear. Thank you very much"

"No problem. See you then"

"'Till tomorrow my lady" I replied. We both laughed a little and hung up.

I had never been nervous about a date in my life. I had never had the jitters, or sweaty palms or butterflies in my stomach. Now I did. I couldn't help it. Sango was an exeptional woman, and I wanted the night to be exeptional too.

At exactly 6:05pm I pulled into the parking lot of her apartment. I walked briskly inside, and nearly jogged once I left the elevator at the seventh floor. When I got to her door, I knocked, hiding the flowers behind my back. Sango was quick to open the door, although she obviously wasn't quite ready.

"Oh, hi Miroku"

"Hello my lady" I pulled the flowers out from behind my back, "These, are for you" Sango looked suprised, but also happy. She smelled the sweet, red roses, thanked me and put them in water.

"I'm almost ready. Just give me a few minutes okay?" I nodded, and made myself comfortable on the couch as I waited for her. Sango didn't take long at all to get ready. When she came out, though, my jaw hit the floor. She looked gorgeous. She had her hair down, which was unusual for her, and she was wearing a beautiful black dress.

"Wow, you look amazing" I said, and I sincerely meant it. I saw Sango blush a little.

"Thank you"

The drive to the restaurant was fairly quiet, but once we were seated we started talking comfortably. I was amazed by Sango. She was so exeptional. I loved how I felt just being around her. I loved making her laugh, it was such a wonderfull noise, like bells ringing.

After a wonderful, though expensive dinner, we drove over to the drive through. Sango gave me a weird look, obviously thinking I was going to try something sneaky on her, but I promised her I had no such intentions.

The movie was a romance, but it was good I had to admit. Sango seemed to like it too. After the movie Sango suggested we talk some more over coffee, and I was all for the idea. We talked about everything under the sun, but I made sure I did not mention the note. The time wasn't right.

After our coffee we talked as I drove her home. Sadly, we made it to the door of her apartment.

"Thank you for a wonderful night" she paused, as if decided to say something more, "and for not groping me" she said jokingly. Somehow I didn't think that was what she meant to say. I smiled anyways.

"It was my pleasure. Thank you for comming" I looked over Sango's delicate features, and knew there was something on her mind. "So, because I took you out tonight, I think I get one request" Sango looked at me quizzically.

"I swear it's pure. I just want to know what's on your mind. Something seems wrong" I said, catching her hand in mine. Sango seemed unsure as to what she should say. Finally she sighed and said, "I was just wondering. Why did you decided to take me out. I mean, I'm not complaining, but it was just so unexpected"

Instead of answering her, I gently pulled her close to me. I searched her eyes. She was so beautiful. I lightly kissed her soft lips. Before I pulled away, I brushed my lips against her cheek, smelling her sweet scent, and I whispered in her ear,

"Life without love is no life at all"

I pulled away from Sango and searched her face for a reaction. She seemed slightly confused, but then she smiled.

"You're right. I am so glad you asked me out tonight. Thank you. I guess I should go though. Goodnight"

"Goodnight, my lady" I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

That night I could barely sleep, I could only replay the night with Sango in my mind, the feel of her lips on mine, the sweet smell of her perfume, everything. I was anxious about the comming day.

Finally, I fell asleep.

When I awoke the next morning I was amazed to see the clock read 12:08 pm. I guess it made sense though, considering how late I had stayed up the night before. I sat down for a very late breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast before hopping in the shower and getting ready to go to the doctors.

My doctors office was a fair drive from my house, which gave me plenty of time to think about the day before. As I neared the office at quater to three I hoped that my tests would come back negative, proving my cancer was gone, at least for now.

The amount of tests done were exhuasting. I always hated it, but I never complained. It took almost an hour before we were done. My doctor promised me a rush on the tests, and said he would call me later that day.

I spent the remainder of my day biding my time, waiting for that call. I was loosing hope that I would ever get the call when I realized it was nine o'clock already. Sighing sadly, I sat down to watch some TV. Just as I got comfortable the phone rang. The caller ID showed my doctors number.

"Hello?" I said quickly.

"Hello, this is doctor Osaki. I have the test results right here in my hand" he said, his voice giving no indication of what they said.

"Well?" I asked impatiently.

"They came back negative, Miroku. I'm glad to say it seems your cancer has all been removed"

There were no words to describe just how happy I was. I knew exactly what do to. Right that moment I decided to go

_Sky divin',  
I went rocky mountain climbin',  
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull name Fu Manchu.  
And I loved deeper,  
And I spoke sweeter,  
And I watched an eagle as it was flyin'.  
And he said someday I hope you get the chance,  
To live like you were dyin'._

_To live like you were dyin'.  
To live like you were dyin'.  
To live like you were dyin'.  
To live like you were dyin'._

From that day on, I promised myself I would always live like I was dying.

A/N: this idea just randomly came to me, and I wrote it out as fast as I could. Please tell me what you think of this story. Review!_  
_


End file.
